Mambo Made Easy

Don’t mistake the title for a battle between myself and the lovely Irish/Zambian singer Samantha Mumba. No, no, this is a case of man vs. reptile.
The day began with our meeting between the Kicking AIDS Out, the National Olympic Committee and the Zambian Red Cross. The meeting went well and we will have to see what comes out from this newly formed partnership. It is a trickle down effect of the larger partnership between the International Red Cross and the International Olympic Committee, …blah, blah, blah (okay I’ll stop).
Anyways, we went back to the farm and Grandma Sakala said she was taking out to dinner in Ndola. And what do you know she wants to take us out for Chinese!! I have at this point decided to take note of all the Chinese restaurants I can find around the world in the most unexpected places (please feel free to comment on some of the unexpected places you might have found one). Anyways, I drove us to the Hong Kong Restaurant and if you happen to go there someday go for the Sichuan Chicken or the Crispy Fried Duck, both are safe bets.
Ok, so when we get back we sit down for a spell and then everyone goes to their rooms to get ready for bed. I had just gotten into my PJs when I hear Grandma Sakala scream my name for help. I go running to the study and ask what’s wrong. She points to her bedroom door and screams snake!
Now I look over at the door and think to myself I seen one of these before, they are just little black garden snakes. So I walk over to it and say:
“This little thing?”
“Watch out that is a black mamba, even the small ones are very poisonous.” She says.
With that bravado killing information she hands me a 3 foot long club to kill it with. I move a little closer to it and that was when it turned towards me so, I slowly backed up (okay, I jumped back). I then tell her I don’t really want to die today. So she goes to get one of the farm hands.
I stay there keeping an eye on the snake so we don't loose track of it, but it starts to go into the bedroom. I start thinking if it disappears in the bedroom no one will be able to sleep tonight, so I lunge at it with the club. With my inept hand eye coordination I miss and it turns towards me. At this point it is clearly pissed off and it begins to raises its body. I lunged again and this time hit it!! And I kept hitting it until it stopped moving. Yup, you read it right, brown Mambo killed a black Mamba.
Anyways, for one night I was a hero and Mama Judo kept talking about it all evening. Grandma Sakala just kept insisting that I visit again soon cause she hates snakes and need someone to kill them. I won’t lie like I wasn’t scared though; that night I kept having nightmares that its family was coming for me (and this time the nightmares weren't from the Mefloquin tablets).
Slayin snakes
Mambo